I first heard the concept of the “permission slip” from director Ava DuVernay. When asked what advice she’d give to aspiring filmmakers, she said, “work without permission.”

Until she worded it that way, I didn’t realize that I had been holding my breath and waiting, waiting, waiting for permission to enter into the professional creative realm. I thought I was following the rules by waiting patiently for “my turn.” Not surprisingly, nothing happened. No matter how good I sounded or how much I tried, my polite nature got me absolutely nowhere and it filled me with self-doubt and resentment.

If you find yourself stumbling on this page, I am giving you a gift I wish someone had granted to me a decade earlier:

“Some people get lucky. But most of us have to do it for ourselves. And the sooner you realize that. The sooner you step out and begin…just begin! You’ll start to find your momentum.” - Ava DuVernay

For women especially, this is antithetical to everything we’ve been taught from a very early age at home and in many institutions. We are rewarded for following rules. Waiting our turn. We got the gold stickers. It felt good.

Perhaps one of the cruelest parts of growing up and becoming an emotionally mature adult is realizing that the institutions entrusted with your education are grooming you to fail as a human. No self-respecting person can abide by the rules set forth in our modern education and workplaces. The education you seek (especially in the arts!) is often not where you are taught to find it.

So where is it? It’s in the doing. Starting. Being bad. Noticing the gaps and seeking the answers. Getting better. The arts are chaotic. There is no 3 month review and promotion. Nepotism runs amuck. There is no human resources department to report bias or discrimination to. Whatever order you seek, you need to create it. So find a discipline, get organized, and begin. Prepare for a 7 year drought. Prepare for a frenzy of activity that overwhelms. Prepare to meet yourself: the good, bad, and the ugly.

Here’s the thing I know to be true: Once you start and share and repeat, you’ll get better. You’ll feel better. You’ll get to know yourself in a deeper way and others will take notice.

Here’s your permission slip.

Elizabeth Gilbert’s Big Magic talks a lot about this. I recommend it if you’re interested in digging deeper into this concept.

Do you agree? This topic is something I’ve struggled with my whole life. I’d love another perspective on it.